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Anonymous asked:
So, story time: I am a transman. I got set up on a blind date with a lady. Nervous at first, but we really hit it off. She is gorgeous and sweet and we're both having the time of our lives, and long story short, we end up back at my place. Around the time things get going, I realize she doesn't know: virtually no one does (the friend who set me up on the date sure didn't). So I start to panic a little, because while I am totally into this girl, I've been turned down before when people (c)

pervocracy:

get past the pants. So I’m suddenly freaking out, and as much as I love that this is happening, I’m trying to defuse the moment a little. I REALLY like this girl, I really don’t want to blow this. So she seems concerned, and asks what’s wrong, and she looks really freaked out that she’s hurt me or something (or so i assumed). At this point, we’re both nearing panic attack territory, and attempt to stop. While we’re trying to detangle from each other, I realize why she’s freaking out:

she’s gotten hard. Turns out, she’s trans as well, and was scared my panic was because I had realized, and was trying to bail on her for it. I explain, and she cracks the fuck up, and so do I, and long story short: we’ve been married for three years now. I figured you might enjoy, as you’re one of my favorite blogs for relationship/sexuality things, and I thought I should share. :D

Awww.  <3  Thank you so much for sharing, and congrats to you and your wife!

THIS IS THE BEST DATING STORY

manic-pixie-dream-churl:

you know what we need in queer flags? heraldry. awful crests. lines that aren’t horizontal. a fucking dragon. a trans lesbian dragon

SOMEONE DRAW THE FLAG

baragoddex:

molly-ren:

pocketmouse:

pocketmouse:

basic spelling when it comes to trans terms, since these things tend to get misspelled fairly often:

  • transgender, not ‘transgendered’. you wouldn’t say someone is gayed; it’s the same thing here
  • trans, not trans*
  • remember to put the space. trans woman, trans man, trans non-binary person
  • not necessarily related to spelling, but don’t use ‘enby’ as a blanket term for all non-binary people. some of us don’t like it or are uncomfortable with it, and prefer ‘nb’ or ‘non-binary’. stick with non-binary until you know what a person is okay with
  • add on if you see this list and have something else to say

i thought of more things:

  • never use ‘it’ UNLESS the trans/non-binary person has specifically said it pronouns are fine. if the person wants you to use it pronouns only, and you refuse or use different pronouns, you are misgendering the person. yes, i know the history of the usage of ‘it’ against trans people. that doesn’t make it okay to misgender someone who has made the conscious decision to use ‘it’ for itself
  • FtM and MtF can be harmful. use these carefully; make sure the person you’re talking about/to is okay with these terms. on that note, don’t talk about trans people being trans to others without the person’s express permission
  • "used to be a boy/girl"/"became a boy/girl" = not okay
  • "opposite gender" erases non-binary people. try "all genders" or "another gender" instead

Wait why are we not using trans* now?

this discussion i was part of a while ago might help you understand some of the reasons

http://inthenihil.tumblr.com/post/70263042185/ciscritical-not-cisphobic-zeroambit

So my feelings about this are ones of great disappointment. : /

I liked the asterisk, because as someone says in the link above, it makes nonbinary stuff more visible. But people using it only for trans women, and disregarding other people’s IDs with it, is definitely NOT how I wanted it to be used!

pocketmouse:

pocketmouse:

basic spelling when it comes to trans terms, since these things tend to get misspelled fairly often:

  • transgender, not ‘transgendered’. you wouldn’t say someone is gayed; it’s the same thing here
  • trans, not trans*
  • remember to put the space. trans woman, trans man, trans non-binary person
  • not necessarily related to spelling, but don’t use ‘enby’ as a blanket term for all non-binary people. some of us don’t like it or are uncomfortable with it, and prefer ‘nb’ or ‘non-binary’. stick with non-binary until you know what a person is okay with
  • add on if you see this list and have something else to say

i thought of more things:

  • never use ‘it’ UNLESS the trans/non-binary person has specifically said it pronouns are fine. if the person wants you to use it pronouns only, and you refuse or use different pronouns, you are misgendering the person. yes, i know the history of the usage of ‘it’ against trans people. that doesn’t make it okay to misgender someone who has made the conscious decision to use ‘it’ for itself
  • FtM and MtF can be harmful. use these carefully; make sure the person you’re talking about/to is okay with these terms. on that note, don’t talk about trans people being trans to others without the person’s express permission
  • "used to be a boy/girl"/"became a boy/girl" = not okay
  • "opposite gender" erases non-binary people. try "all genders" or "another gender" instead

Wait why are we not using trans* now?

leathercoven:

my hot fat trans body modeling one of our new designs, the Diamondback Holster 

my love for this photoset never ends :3