Anonymous asked: "what you define as sex is up to you, you get to decide how many people you’ve had sex with" I dunno about this one I feel like you can't have PIV intercourse with someone and then be like "that didn't count as sex." xD
I dunno. This gets into where on one hand, we want the word “sex” to describe a specific thing… but on the other, it comes with a ton of baggage of “it was sex therefore it was a super big deal full of meaning, and even if it was meaningless, that itself has a meaning.”
As long as the baggage stays, I think the right to decline the baggage stays.
I think about whether something I did was “sex” more than I like to admit.
Once, I told a partner of mine that I enjoyed the sex we’d had the night before… only to have him claim we hadn’t had sex. To him, giving me oral for an hour didn’t count. I was miffed.
Another issue: feederism scenes are firmly part of my definition of “sex”, even if PIV is never involved. But then I wonder if my partners feel the same way about the scenes we’ve done together. I worry that if they don’t see the things we do as “real” sex acts, they find them less meaningful.
(by Erika Moen)
If you like reading sexually explicit things, I can’t recommend Oh Joy Sex Toy enough. It’s nominally a comic reviewing sex toys, but really it’s adorable, informative, sexy, heartwarming, and just generally manages to pack ten pounds of awesome into a five-pound bag.
So I wrote a story about sex and ghosts for the Frisky and this is the gif they used for it I can’t
boscowasmygrandad said: What, all fetishes?? Ha, that is not an argument that could endure much scrutiny..
But there is that idea that people with money are the ones that can afford to be really perverted, right? Like, sometimes people say that Rome got too rich/politically corrupt like this somehow led to people becoming gay, rather than realizing that there were already gay people before the fall of Rome.
I’m sure there’s a few more layers to it than that. Like, rich people can more easily afford to be semi-public about their fetishes because they don’t have to be as attuned to what people think of them. It’s also easier and more fun to write about people who can afford the best fetish gear, and you want fantasies to happen in lush settings because they’re fantasies. But “money = corruption = ‘corrupt’ sexual practices” is still a trope people IRL seem to use a lot without even realizing that the argument they’re making basically boils down to “poor people can’t have weird fetishes”.